Healing Begins
by JessieJ.B
Summary: One Shot; 3x13 Blackout - Started with Naley eating cereal & Nathan remembering things about Haley's appearance. Picked it up with my interpretation of the missing scenes; flashback style :)


Haley cupped the cereal bowl around her face and downed the last remnants of milk, then placed the bowl on the table in front of her; her hands loosening their grip on it.

"Ahhhh." She breathed out, after turning to Nathan with a silly smile plastered on her face.

Nathan watched her intently; his large frame remaining perfectly still, as he continued to chew and reciprocated with a grin - this one was different though, with a hint of something else there.

It was all in his eyes.

"What?! Yes, I had a second bowl. I was hungry!" She responded to his silence, looking from Nathan to the bowl and back to Nathan, to fend off the slight embarrassment that had crept into her smile.

Nathan shook his head and wiped his mouth with his hand. "No, it's not that. I was just remembering." He shifted in his chair and looked back at her.

"Remembering what?" Haley questioned.

"Your hair." She leaned her head to the side, waiting for him to elaborate. "You wore it that way the first day you tutored me."

Haley adjusted her position in her chair so that she was facing him better.

"You remember how I wore _my hair_ the first day I tutored you?" She asked in a surprised tone; her voice lower, and her smile changing to one of a mix between awe, disbelief, and tenderness.

"Of course." Nathan said sweetly.

"What else do you remember?" Her eyes narrowed and her smile turned curious.

Nathan looked up before continuing with the next one, which he knew would be a dig, but a well-deserved one at that.

"I remember the ugly ass poncho that you wore." The look on his face was one of pure satisfaction. He could go on and on until the end of time about how gross that thing was. He really needed Haley to understand the disdain he felt for it.

"Oh my god! Yes, you've made your feelings for that particular item of clothing very clear." She gestured grandly with her hands, as Nathan snickered quietly to himself.

"Come on." She swatted him playfully in the arm. "Tell me really." She drew her legs upward and placed them on his lap.

She couldn't wait for him to indulge her. She loved reminiscing about the early times in their relationship, when everything was lighter and right - before Chris and...No! She didn't even want her mind to go to that place. She wouldn't let anything ruin this perfect moment with her husband. They were long overdue for one of these.

"Well umm, let's see. These jeans..." He patted her legs. "...you wore 'em the day when we fell asleep in the park together. And uh, these shoes...you wore these the day we got stuck at the DMV for _five _hours..."

"Oh god." Haley mumbled, after leaning into Nathan's shoulder for a few seconds.

A chuckle escaped him. "...While we waited for your new license with my last name on it."

She withdrew her face from his strong form, grinning from ear to ear. "Mmm..."

She closed her eyes, grasping onto _it_.

* * *

_"What the hell are you doing, you fool?" Nathan halted, analyzing every inch of Haley's body that was twirling in big circles around the parking lot, as they made their way closer to the entrance of the DMV. _

_He fixed his eyes on the dark, tight jeans that hugged her in all the right places, and the purple halter top that revealed the tiniest bit of her cleavage. God, his girl was hot...and strange._

_"Just being young and carefree." She yelled out excitedly, as she skipped over to Nathan and leapt into his arms with a great force that almost knocked him off his bearings. She wrapped her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist; her doe eyes peering up at him. _

_"I am only 16 you know. So...that's allowed isn't it?". She replaced her confused look the next second with flirty eyes and a seductive bite to her lip. _

_Nathan crashed his lips onto hers immediately. She knew he couldn't control himself when she used the lip trick on him. It drove him wild and she loved dangling it in front of him._

_Their mouths mixed together in a fury of passion and heat, each of them savouring the combined scents of perfume and cologne, and their thirst for proximity._

_A few untamed seconds in, Nathan suddenly pulled his face away, leading for Haley to hesitantly slide her body down off his before they would both lose their last bit of self-control right out in public. _

_Noticing the disappointment in her face, he attempted to lighten the mood. "Well...actually, to answer your question...I'm pretty sure it really isn't allowed. Not anymore." _

_Haley furrowed her brow at him, confused and still reeling from their steamy exchange. _

_Nathan grabbed onto her waist. "We've been married for what now...a month? So I think we're about right on schedule to start acting like an old, boring, married couple. Let ourselves go. I don't know, maybe you bust out a pair of mom jeans." He smacked her firmly in the ass, as a goofy laugh tore out of him._

_"Ahahaa." She flinched by his action, then threw her head back - them both entering into a fit of laughter. Her boy always knew just when to bring out the humour. It was one of the things she loved most about him!_

_"Okay...eww...Nathan that is...soo...gross!" She managed between laughs and grabbed hold of his other arm._

_"What, this?" He smacked her ass again and left his hand there, enjoying the feel of her juicy rump. _

_"Don't make me punish you, cause I can keep going." His smile turned serious momentarily._

_"Oooh. I'm good with that, trust me." She winked at him, her big brown eyes sparkling. _

_She then stifled her cheeriness; her face filled with disgust and her lip curled. "No, but Nathan, back to eww - that mom jeans thing...I would NEVER do that to myself...or to you for that matter." _

_Haley's eyes widened and she stepped back a little. "And wait...I am not going to be a mom anytime soon. We are not having a baby anytime soon...although, I promise you we will someday." Her tone raised at the end and she sighed. _

_She needed him to feel her sincerity in that moment. She broke the distance between them, kissing him ever so lightly. _

_When she pulled away and Nathan's eyes opened, his face softened by the sentiment. He tucked a strand of her smooth brown hair behind her ear with one hand and palmed the side of her cheek with the other. _

_They were still so young but he knew she was the one. The one he was going to grow old with. The only one he would ever make babies with. _

_"I'm gonna hold you to that, Haley James."_

_"Good. Because today, right now - after waiting for like what...five hours - we are marching in there and this Haley will be a James no longer!" She said with a convicted nod of her head. "Well at least according to the Department of Motor Vehicles, haha." _

_She paused. "How does that sound, Nathan Scott?"_

_"It sounds perfect..." He tapped her nose lightly. "...Haley...James...Scott." He swayed his head from side to side, accentuating each of her three names. _

_Wow. She could listen to those words on repeat, forever. It was like soothing music to her ears._

_"Alright then, let's do this hubby." Haley clapped and bounced up in excitement as they turned; Nathan threw his arm over her tiny shoulder, wrapping her up in his strong embrace._

_"I can't believe you talked me into marrying you, by the way." Haley smirked up at him. "We're 16!" She rolled her eyes dramatically._

_"I know. What the hell was I thinking? But hey, stick around, maybe I can talk you into doing some other things as well." Nathan joked, his voice dripping with lust. _

_Haley giggled and pushed her body closer into his. She would definitely be into doing 'other things' - dirty, naughty things. When she suddenly felt her cheeks heat up, she willed herself to push her x-rated thoughts away. They would for sure be giving each other the real deal later on._

_As they continued walking, Nathan felt his eyes naturally drift down toward Haley. Truth be told - all of their childish banter aside - he couldn't believe he had scored the most gorgeous, sexy, intelligent wife - let alone even a girlfriend of that caliber. She was without a doubt the sweetest, kindest person he had ever known, with the most gentle soul. _

_His eyes trailed up and down her body, letting them linger here and there. Everywhere. God, even those boots on her...they always just did something for the way she walked. Allowing for an ultra sexy strut that screamed WOMA-_

_"Ohmygod!" Haley yelped, as Nathan felt her falling to the ground, bringing him down with her into a chaotic heap of limbs and laughter._

_"Did your parents...ever teach...you...how to walk...properly?" Nathan howled out in a teasing tone, almost losing his breath between laughs. _

_He eventually got to his knees and placed his hands on the ground at either side of her head , hovering above his complete klutz-of-a-wife._

_"Nathan, I tripped. It's not my fault that the ground is uneven here near the curb." _

_They couldn't contain their amusement for a good minute or so._

_"Help me, please." She pouted. "Before we get run over by a car or something. Cause I need that license!"_

_Once he made it to his feet, Nathan grabbed her hand and pulled her up in one swift, effortless motion. He continued to chuckle all the while._

_"Thank you, baby." She smoothed her clothes out and regained her composure. "Alright, let's get in there right now, otherwise you might not want to be married to me."_

_"Hales, you're so cute. We're already married, and besides, the DMV doesn't have anything to do with that anyway."_

_"Yea, but it just seems more official, you know? Changing my last name on my IDs. Like...it's for real." She squealed and covered her hand over her mouth. _

_At times, she still couldn't fathom the fact that she was married. It was such a major life decision to commit to at such a young age, yet somehow, it was the easiest one she had ever made._

_Nathan drew her close to him. "Whatever you say. Okay, let's go you goof". _

_He offered one of his notoriously crooked smiles and intertwined his fingers with hers._

_"But my boot got messed up from the fall." She feigned hurt, looking down at the fresh scuff mark and back up into Nathan's perfectly blue puppy eyes. _

_Haley knew these eyes, this look - always expressing his inner state of contentment, brought on by his constant desire to make her happy...even when it meant allowing her to get her way._

_He knew the drill whenever she got lazy or simply wanted an excuse to grab onto him. _

_He let her hand go free and positioned his body in front of her, hunching down low for big and small to meet. _

_"Okay." He held his hands out at his sides, ready for her._

_" 1, 2...3" They said in unison. _

_Haley launched herself onto his broad, muscular back, clinging tightly around his neck; Nathan securing his hands under her thighs. She brought her face right close to his hair, pressed her nose against it, and breathed in his refreshing smell, welcoming the warmth that permeated through his shirt. _

_The stillness began to set in. Louder than ever. _

_She could stay up here forever._

_Nathan took a few strides forward while thinking back to all the ridiculously fun and random antics they had gotten into the past five hours, while waiting for Haley's new license. This was a day they both would definitely never forget!_

_He smiled inwardly, before shaking his head. Those damn boots!_

* * *

Haley opened her eyes slowly. She was beaming from the memory.

"What about my shirt?" She nodded down toward it.

"You wore that shirt one morning when you sat in the livingroom, you were playing that Beatles song on your guitar. The sun just framed your face so perfectly." Nathan spoke softly, holding her gaze.

Their eyes never left each other.

All of Nathan's senses abandoned him; his mind floating away from him.

* * *

_Nathan slowly raised himself into a sitting position, as he wiped the sleep from his eyes. Even a good night's rest wasn't enough to revive his aching body after the grueling two-hour basketball workout he put himself through the previous day. _

_The playoffs were among them, and Whitey was making the team run two-a-days in order to ensure a win against Masonboro in the coming weeks. Naturally, Nathan thought it wouldn't hurt to do some extra workouts on his own. Man, was he wrong! It hurt everywhere._

_He lazily stood up and groaned, stretching his arms high above his head, when he heard the faintest sound of a sweet melody coming from the next room. His girl had the voice of an angel - so rich, yet pure and honest. His face automatically lit up at her sound, as he made his way into the bathroom. _

_He undressed and stepped into the shower, knowing that the cool water against his skin would be just the thing to wake him up._

_He raked a hand through his hair, letting the water fall evenly over him and drown him completely, as he thought of one OTHER thing that would've REALLY risen him from the dead. _

_But him and Haley weren't...exactly...doing that. Okay, they weren't doing that at all. He let out a frustrated sigh._

_At that moment, a flood of thoughts and emotions came at him, just as the powerful water came at him like a rush of unforgiving darts. _

_Would Haley ever be ready to have sex?...With him? _

_Nathan was never known to be one who exercised a lot of patience. He never had to with Peyton or any of the other girls he'd been with. _

_But he knew Haley was different than all of them. She'd managed to make him see sex in a new light - as something that should be reserved for that one very special person, worth more than a thousand easy lays. And that was part of the reason why this abstinence thing killed him so much. He did feel that way about her. She was THAT special person to him. Couldn't she see it? _

_They had this cerebral, unspoken connection and he wanted so badly to express his feelings to her. _

_To let their bodies speak to each other. In rhythm, and in the same language. _

_Nathan's head started to spin from the intensity of his emotions. He attempted to shake his mind free._

_In all honesty, it was terrifying to him that one little tutor girl had the ability to awaken a part of him he never knew existed before._

_Ever since the emancipation from his parents, he felt a great sense of freedom. He loved having his own space; a quiet place for him and Haley to be alone and get to know each other even better. _

_She'd come over to the apartment almost every day after school since he moved in, but last night was her first official 'sleepover' - tons of groping and making out, nothing else. _

_Of course, she had lied to her parents and told them she was sleeping over at Peyton's. Nathan let out a tiny chuckle as he grabbed the soap and began to lather it all over himself. _

_Peyton and Haley - his ex girlfriend and current girlfriend - friends? Could things get any weirder? _

_He shook his head to try and clear the image from his mind, when another one took up residence. _

_23. _

_The number jumped around in his mind. _

_He'd first noticed it a few mornings ago, and although they'd argued about it, and then patched things up, it still struck him as odd that she was bold enough to get a tattoo of his jersey number, yet she insisted on holding out on him. He still had trouble understanding the logic behind her reasoning for her decision. _

_Tattoos and sex both signified permanence and 'no turning back'. Well, at least no one sets out to get a tattoo and then later remove it. _

_The point was, the intention of making a 'forever' decision is there with either option._

_Nathan closed his eyes, dragging himself out of his daze. Deep down, he knew Haley wasn't even the true cause of his frustration and it wasn't fair to put all this on her. _

_Maybe his problem wasn't with what Haley wouldn't give him, but instead with what HE possibly COULDN'T give HER. _

_There it was. He'd been avoiding it for far too long._

_He tried to push it all away by hastily picking up the shampoo and proceeding to pour a gob into the palm of his hand. _

_He needed to get out of this shower, quick! He'd stepped into it, hoping to fix one problem, and now he'd be leaving it with a set of completely unrelated issues. _

_'Good on ya, Nate.' His inner mind whispered, taunting him._

_Shortly thereafter, he was back in the bedroom, half done dressing himself, when it all started again. _

_Nathan felt the need to sit down on the edge of the bed, as a sudden inability to breathe overtook him. He swallowed hard and bunched up the shirt he was holding in his hands, as if it were some type of stress ball - a channel through which he hoped he could get rid of all of it. His doubts. His fears. His insecurities._

_Ever since a few nights ago when he made his grand revelation to Haley that he loved her, he'd felt so vulnerable, in both good ways and bad. There was no question in his mind that he wanted to be with her and give himself over to her, but he'd always been an emotionally closed off person and sometimes he wondered if he could truly change that. _

_If he could change other aspects of himself as well._

_And there he was again - back in the gym, falling to the floor during the basketball game. _

_The memory of that night crept into the forefront of his mind every once in a while. He still couldn't believe he had been stupid enough to do drugs._

_Nathan released the shirt from his death grip; his hands moving up to greet the pain in his face. He hung his head, resting his hands around his face and his elbows on his knees._

_When he went to see Haley after leaving the hospital that night, he felt so completely embarrassed and ashamed. Although she'd forgiven him, he often wondered if he would ever slip back into his old ways - selfish, rude, arrogant, immature little boy. He didn't exactly have the best upbringing or the best role models, so being a good guy was still freshly explored territory for him. _

_Sometimes he felt that he would never be good enough or worthy of Haley - that he would somehow always manage to disappoint her in some way or screw things up between them. _

_He couldn't bear the thought._

_Nathan's face fell, as the reality of it stung, just like the tears that had formed in his eyes. _

_He needed to tell Haley what he was thinking. Maybe she could give him some type of reassurance or comfort if they talked this all out._

_He got up off the bed and walked a few short steps before pausing to wipe his tear-stained cheeks. He didn't want Haley to see him a mess and make her worry, especially since she was enjoying her downtime in the livingroom._

_Nathan opened the bedroom door and continued forward, recognizing her guitar's soft vibrations of a familiar Beatles song, accompanied by her low humming. _

_After rounding the corner of the hallway, he stopped dead in his tracks at the first sight of her. _

_His lips parted slightly as a comforting warmth spread throughout his entire body and a pang of joy entered his heart. His eyes began to moisten instantly._

_The sun's rays surrounded her cherubic face, almost blurring the edges of her fair, creamy skin; her dark hair fell in delicate waves down her shoulders. She was even wearing one of his favourite shirts. _

_She looked absolutely radiant in that moment - a calm and inner peace emanating from her that Nathan desperately grabbed onto. _

_In one instant, all his doubts seemed to melt away. This one simple instant was all it took for everything to snap back into focus. _

_He stood there, mesmerized and overwhelmed. Frozen in place. _

_He'd never been so completely lost in someone before._

_It then hit him._

_Nathan knew, right then and there, that everything would be okay. _

_Here was this girl - this kind, compassionate beauty who had seen past all his flaws. _

_She made him want to do better. To be better. _

_Haley trusted him and believed in him, so he needed to believe in himself. _

_No one had ever inspired such change in him before._

_She was his, and he was hers._

_SHE was his saving grace._

_He was going to marry this woman someday. He could feel it in his bones. _

* * *

And he did.

"Blackbird..." Haley smiled up at him tenderly, pulling him back into the present. "...that was the name of the Beatles song I played."

Nathan looked away, a gentle smile finding his lips. "I remember more than you think."

He turned back, their eyes locking in on each other. _Promise and hope._

They knew this was their second chance. A fresh start. A new beginning.

Nothing else mattered.


End file.
